33 weeks...oh my oh my

So it's been a while since we've posted. Mainly because we didn't know exactly what to say, how to say it, or what was happening. Over the past few months we have seen how God works in amazing ways and how He will continue to be our shepard through all of the ups and downs in life.

I need so start this post by going back to about a year ago. It was about this time last year that I started to have the dress rehearsals for the living nativity at our church. I was playing the virgin Mary and Scott was Joseph. There was one Friday that I had gone to the doctors to talk to them about some health problems that were happening with me. The doctor looked at me and said something to the effect of, "I'm not saying that you can't have any children, but you won't be able to for a while. We need to level out your hormones before your body will allow to have children."

Then, let's fast forward to the following day. It was a dress rehearsal so we wore our full costumes. This meant, I got to put on the baby belly! I balled my eyes out before church, on the way to church, and at moments when it was just Scott and I at church. I had this fake reality of pretending I could get pregnant but knowing that it was so far from the truth. Things of this nature continued to attack me over the next few months. Houses of friends filled with pregnant Mamas, people asking me when it was time for us to have kids, and the reality of staring at pregnant women all over. Scott and I realized, we have to put this into God's hands. We know that it can't happen now, but God is bigger and He can form and shape our minds and our hearts. And, he can perform a miracle if He wants. We prayed...we prayed some more...and we continued to pray.

In May, I had invited some of the youth group girls over for dinner. I was cooking chicken with my favorite (or what was) seasoning. I almost puked all over the pan of chicken. I ran into the bedroom and said, "Scott, I'm gonna need you to finish cooking this chicken because I am pregnant." Little did I know, at that point, I was already 8 weeks pregnant.

God is good all the time and he has been a constant source of strength for us to look to! Yesterday at my baby shower at church I was given this, needless to say there was a lot of almost crying that I did when I opened it.

So now onto the health reality of this pregnancy. All of the previous part of this post is just to explain that Scott and I are completely trusting and resting in Jesus as we move ahead. In late August (August 26th to be exact) I had an MRI done to figure out why I was having continual headaches. I must say that it was on that day that I felt our Little One move for the very first time inside of me! They found a small tumor (not cancerous at all!!!!) in my brain. It's causing the headaches and will continue to until it is removed. What this means is that I have to have surgery to get the tumor removed after I have the baby. So, we are scheduled to have a c-section in late December and get to meet our miracle that Jesus has blessed us with. Then, about 6 weeks later I will go into the city to have the tumor removed.

Scott and I are fully trusting Jesus and are so thankful for the fact that we live so close to the city, we have wonderful doctors, and we have an amazing support system through our church and our families. We know that if God would allow us to start a family when the doctors said it would be impossible, then why would we even begin to worry about something else. God is good all the time, this is something that we are sure of!

Thanks for reading!

Scott, Liz, and Little One

Week 16

Yesterday I finally made it to church after being away for a few weeks and then being sick and I realized how much I love my church family. It's so amazing to be at church and be surrounded by people that care and pray and love like no other group of people that I have ever met. To me thats part of what church is, a great community of people supporting each other. So if you are someone from my church family, I love you guys and appreciate you!

Here's what's going on with me. I am not starting my 5th week of having headaches. These aren't just little headaches like "oh I've been out in the sun to long" or "I haven't had my coffee or diet coke yet" kind of headaches. These are the kind where you want to curl up in your bed, close all the blinds to make it dark, and sleep your headache away. I do have to say that for the most part I have adjusted pretty well and function through most of my days in a somewhat normal way. But then there are other days, where I just am done and go to bed at 7 because I can't be awake anymore.

So what are we doing about all of this... Well, I have been to appointment after appointment. They have decided that it has nothing to do with the baby, which is good. But, because of the baby, I can't be on a lot of medications that they would normally put me on. So, they have ruled out sinus infections and not can't figure out what's going on. So I had an MRI done on Friday and haven't gotten any results back yet. We are just hoping for some answers and pray that the baby is okay with the meds that I am taking.

Please pray, and thank you for praying!!!

Liz and Scott and Little One!

Week 14

Everyone's favorite questions....

How are you feeling?

Do you know if it's a boy or girl?

When are you due?

I feel a little like when I graduated from high school and everyone asks you the same questions over and over. This time though, I'm not getting tired about talking about it. I am happy with God's plan for our family and I love that every time someone asks, I have the oppurtunity to talk about Jesus and His plan. I love sharing that this pregnancy had nothing to do with our plan but everything to do with HIS plan!

So for those of you who want to know the answers to the questions..

How am I feeling...

For the most part I am really lucky. My side effects to prenancy have been minimal and I count myself blessed. I am most thankful that I am not craving crazy things like pickles covered with peanut butter. Although I do have to say that the healthy food that I eat is my choice, the junk food is always for Little One. I have had a headache for a few weeks and I am beginning to get frustrated because I can't make it go away. I have an appt to see another doctor about it tomorrow!

Do we know if it's a he or a she?

Simple answer...no

When am I due?

New years day!!!

In other news, all of the tests from the genetesist and everything else have come back looking really good so far. We are excited to watch our baby grow and change. We get to see our baby again on August 1st!

Little One

Well, it's about time that I sit down and write down (actually type) about God's incredible plan and how he works in amazing ways. It's in moments like these, that I wonder how anyone can question God's love and sacrifice for us.

A while ago Scott and I finally had the discussion of "I think we're ready to try to be parents". That, let me tell you, was one of the scariest and hardest conversations on my life. I have always known that I wanted to be a Mom, and anyone that knows me, knows that I want to be a Mom. I have told people for a long time, I practice all day at work, just I get to go home to a quiet house at night.

It didn't take too long to figure out that my body wasn't doing what it was supposed to be doing. I felt sick all the time and just wasn't together. It was frustrating, and a little scary as well. Scott and I prayed, and prayed, and prayed. I went to the doctor and they put me on some medication that was supposed to regulate my body....I had an allergic reaction to it. I went back to the doctors, and they took me off the meds and said that I had to wait a few months to try to get back on it. This meant th

at I can not get pregnant.

It was hard. It's hard to know that something that you want so badly is something that God is not allowing in your life. Scott and I spent a lot of time praying but really never questioning. One thing that I learned with my precious niece is that God's plan is bigger than mine will ever be, even if I don't like it. Therefore, Scott and I knew that this was God's plan. He had a perfect plan, even if it meant waiting or adopting, or not having our own kids. We talked to a bunch of people that questioned our stability and the only thing that we could look to was God's amazing grace and compassion.

Fast forward to a bunch of months later...I had a group of senior girls coming over for dinner to hang out and talk about life and graduating and college. I was making some chicken for salad and dumped my favorite seasoning of garlic and crushed red pepper on top. I nearly puked all over the pan. I walked into ou

r bedroom and said something to the effect of, " Scott, I'm pregnant and I need you to finish cooking the chicken." A few days later, we confirmed my suspicion with some blood tests. WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!! We have now gotten to see our baby and our Little one's heart beat. We still have a lot of unanswered questions but we know a few things for sure...

The God that we serves provides for our lives when we least expect it

When Jesus says, "where 2 or more are gathered I am there"- it's really true

God is Faithful. Period.

We will continue to keep people updated as we find out more info. Our due date is January 1st! Right now we have an appt. on the June 23 to meet with a genetesist and get some more ultrasounds and blood work done. Please pray!

God is good all the time...this I know is true!

Today is the day that no one in my family is really looking forward to. It's been a year since our sweet Lydia has gone to be with Jesus. It's a day that as a family, we are facing together and knowing that Jesus is our strength through it all. I have learned more things from that little girl than from anyone that I have ever known. People can tell you things until you are blue in the face, but when you experience them, it becomes a whole new world. I realize that today (and for the past year), I have had a choice. I can either choose to mourn my niece and question why she isn't here. Or, I can rejoice in the fact that I had a chance to know her and be so thankful for all the things that I have seen Jesus do through her. It's amazing how easy it is to allow satan to pull me into the mourning and questioning God. It can be VERY hard! But in the end, from day to day, I trust Jesus to pick me up and hold me when I have those hard moments.

Today...today my heart aches. My heart hurts. My heart is sad. It was today a year ago that I got that dreaded phone call while I was on my break at work. The phone call that I had dreaded for 8 months and 8 days. It's today that brings back a week of hard times with my family. Let me say though, that even though I miss Lydia, and I miss visiting her, and bringing her cupcakes, and holding her while she seizures, and listening to her noises, and taking her for walks, and helping her eat...I WILL rejoice. Jesus has used her in incredible ways. My heart aches for my brother and sister, but I pray that today they can rejoice as well.

Earlier this year I was on a retreat with my youth group and the band there played this song. I have been going over it and over it in the past week and I thought about this sweet girl.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qo9SrV2KOV0

please watch this video, it's incredible.

In memory of this sweet girl, I am going to run another triathlon this year. This year Scott and I are running it together to celebrate the life that Jesus has given us.

Today, and everyday, I remember that Lydia is made new and rejoicing with Jesus!

So it's been quite some time since I have ventured onto blogging but I decided that today is a good day to do it. Today, as my husband kindly shared, I am now closer to 50 than I am to being a newborn. It's been a good day of movies, scrap booking, showering, washing the inside of my refrigerator, and of course grocery shopping with coupons. It's been a good day to sit back and see how good Scott and I have it. Definitely not because of our own doings, but because of the life that we live in Jesus and the comfort that we find in Him alone.

In the last year Scott and I have realized that money is just not a fun thing. No matter how hard we work, it seems like there is more going out than coming in. We sat down and realized that there were necessities, niceties, and frivolities. We decided to cut out the last two to try to see if we could really manage this whole living and owning a house and not being at camp. The reason that I share this, is because it is a testament to our Jesus. He has provided for our EVERY need. We have been able to save up some money and do some things that we never thought possible. God has been so good to us. There was a few months ago that Scott and I had both been running around like a chicken without our heads. At one point we sat down and said, "wouldn't it be nice to go on a date together someday again". The very next day, a gift certificate showed up in our mailbox at church. It was that moment, that I knew that God was going to provide for our needs, as long as we remained faithful. It's the small things that sometimes just blow my mind.

So as a wife sitting at home on my birthday, I want to also share another moment where God has been so faithful. We have hopes and dreams, like any family, and we want so badly to be able to do some of those things. On Friday, Scott called me at work (this is never a good thing) and he said, "Liz, I got the promotion". I don't think I have ever been so proud of my husband. He god a promotion at work.

God is so good.

God is so faithful.

As I was saying to some of the teens at church last night.

Even though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death (or sitting alone at a lunch table to a kid in jr. high) I will fear NO evil because Jesus is with me!